Without a Paddle
Ponderings of an Uncommon Life
“Growth” Mindset
When I was little, my mom had an amazing garden that she loved very much. I remember walking into it impressed by the variety of vegetables she had growing . For years, I couldn’t eat canned green beans from the store, because they just didn’t taste the same as the ones from her garden. And the first pickled okra I ever remember having was grown in my mom’s garden.
This Spring, I have been working hard at my own gardening project. Stuart’s family owns a ranch with a small pecan bottom, and that is where our garden grows. One day soon we will be living out on that property.
Measuring around 12,000 square feet, our garden contains numerous types of vegetables and fruits – corn, squash, beans, cucumbers, strawberries, and chard, just to name a few. We have berry bushes, a peach tree, and designated space to add more trees soon. We will also have watermelons and cantaloupes in July. I tilled it, built the rows, planted it and have tended it mostly myself – with a little bit of help from my kids and family. Being out there always makes me happy – and provides me with time outside that I have really missed since I have not been band directing this year. (I never realized how much I’d miss that part of my band gig!)
I almost didn’t do a garden this year. Helena will be going into the hospital on June 4 to start a lengthy casting procedure that will involve the majority of the summer. She will be in the hospital in Dallas for 4-6 weeks, far away from my garden, then will be in a hard plaster cast for 4 weeks.. I will be staying with Helena throughout her hospital stay. When I realized the significant amount of time we’d be in the hospital, I wasn’t sure it would be worth my time and energy to work on a green. I kept thinking – why start if I can’t be there to finish?
After a lot of thought and a discussion with Stuart, I decided that it would be worth starting the garden for the simple purpose of finding out what will work. We decided to go about this by starting lots of seeds in our greenhouse. Seed starting was something I needed to improve upon, so it was a positive use of time. To my surprise, most everything came up!
Next, I had to learn the best way to keep the plants alive coming out of the greenhouse. If you put them out too early, they will die out. If you put them out too late, you stunt their growth.
Since late February, I have been going out to work in my garden at least a couple of times per week after work and on most weekends. There are lots of weeds, bugs, and at times, snakes (yikes) — and it is hard to keep up with that part, but we do what we can. The garden has taken up a lot of time and effort – but the rewards have been fully worth it!
I have also spent a lot of time reflecting on how hard we have worked to get Helena to “grow” — and to do the things that others do without thinking. Helena has worked toward the goal of walking independently since she was born! For her, whether growth in this area was “worth it” is a non-negotiable issue. It must be a part of her daily life. She has to come up with solutions as to how to do many things. Just as a garden brings sunlight and freedom to stay away from a grocery line – the solutions we come up with bring her invaluable independence when they finally bear fruit.
As with our garden planting experiments , we have had to experiment with different ways to help Helena – she is truly one of a kind. Some experiments work, some don’t. We purchased rattles with the goal of encouraging arm movement. We purchased phone apps for the sole purpose of distracting Helena when doing stretches daily. We bought several tricycles based on the distance of the pedals from the handle bars and the degree angle between the axle, handle bars and pedals in order because it was worth the try. We bought monkey bars to enhance upper body strength, and played balance games on the Wii. Stuart has built special toys to encourage certain types of movement. And we use lots of toys non-traditionally. Just like choosing which seed to buy or which organic pest control method is best, much time has been spent analyzing tasks and trying unconventional ways to encourage movement. All of that effort has culminated in some great growth and independence for Helena.
As we prepare to take Helena to Scottish Rite Hospital in Dallas next week, we will be preparing ourselves for yet another unconventional way of treatment. Quengel casting is not a common procedure for AMC. It was previously used on polio patients, and recently been revived as a treatment option that doctors are now trying as an alternative to surgery. Most kids with arthrogryposis have multiple surgeries before they turn 18. These surgical options, while very necessary at times, could eventually result in a buildup of scar tissue and affect her as an adult. The Quengel casting option is lengthy, but is a non-surgical method that we feel is worth a try.
Our family has never been the type to just jump at the most convenient option. Sometimes the lengthy path to a desired result is the best in the end, and reaps the greatest rewards. And so I will bid my garden farewell in a few days. Worth it? You bet.
Everything worth doing in life requires work.
“Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing.”
―
One Comment on ““Growth” Mindset”
Leave a reply to Daniel Cancel reply
Recent Comments
 | Lucille on Learning To Slow Down |
| Constance Brown on Learning To Slow Down | |
 | musicamom07 on Learning To Slow Down |
 | Gloria J Achterberg on Learning To Slow Down |
| AMC Awareness Month… on Perfection Redefined |
Without a Paddle 
Jennifer, Thank you for the insightful post. There are many situations I did not pursue simply because I could not predict the outcome. Hopefully your experience will make me jump at the next opportunity.
LikeLike